Sir Elton’s Dirty Diaper Fantasy

A month ago I was contacted by Damian Whitworth, a feature writer at The Times of London. He had heard Elton John at a movie premiere say, “I love the smell of nappies.” For some reason, Mr. Whitworth felt his readers would value my opinion on the topic. Or perhaps he just couldn’t find any other PhDs willing to be quoted by name.

In any case, I obliged and promptly forgot about it. Today I finally got around to looking for the story on LexisNexis (Rupert Murdoch has The Times behind a paid-subscription firewall). It turned up on page 2 of the January 25 edition under the headline “Don’t go breaking a fart . . .” [Heh.]

For all you poopy-minded fans of syrupy pop ballad icons, here’s the relevant bit:

A new-born baby soils an average of 60 nappies a week. Some claim that they really don’t mind changing them but, says olfactory scientist Dr Avery Gilbert, it’s often those with a “less hands-on” approach to the nappy who “associate the iconic scent of baby powder with the entire experience”.

“New born baby poop doesn’t smell all that bad,” he says, “but once they start eating solid foods it’s a different story, but still less offensive than the adult variety. Sir Elton isn’t attracted to that, is he?”

Ooops. Did I just smear one of Britain’s favorite elderly “rock” stars? 

Well, who cares. I like him even less than Sir Paul McCartney.

Ooops. I did it again.